Category: train travel

January: The Month of Beginnings #baypathmfa #morningview

The sun rose this morning over the top of my chosen treadmill at the gym — shining its winter light and miniscule heat over the frozenness of nearly week old snow and ice that may not melt by spring. In between my view over the treadmill’s control panel, planes landed from the north — following the path of the Potomac River en route to nearby National Airport (as a long timer here, I have never brought myself to call the airport by its new-ish name). The morning begins, the treadmill begins, the planes begin their rapid descent — beginnings are abundant in January. My birthday falls on the first day of January: ground zero for a new year’s beginning throes…there is no escaping the idea that change is upon me each and every year as the ball drops in Times Square — I begin each year with a new number to celebrate, revile or make peace with — there is no predicting how each number will strike me until it us upon me. This year, January is off to a fiery start – new roles and responsibilities, a pending graduation, most likely relocation; the level of planning required to surf through the next five months is filled with if-then statements.

As this month roars along, I find myself in the position of intern as part of my MFA program — a totally new role for me as I’ve never been an intern at any point in my career. And admittedly, it’s not a title I’m completely comfortable with at this point in my life, perhaps I’ll become more accustomed to it as the current semester proceeds. I am incredibly fortunate to be spending my intern time with an organization, and people, that I have great respect for — and I’m thankful for the long-term relationships that I’ve carried forward to be in this position from my previous professional life. So for this beginning, I think of it more in terms of homecoming with new eyes and practical mission: my work will be in a field that I have a keen interest in with people that are dedicated to preservation of sacred spaces and places, community building, the arts and knowledge sharing. My realm will focus on the publishing aspect of the organization from writing profiles of funding recipients, to interviewing community leaders and religious leaders that will lead to published convening reports and learning the ins and outs of organizational publishing — with which I have previous experience, but new trends and means will provide new insight and ideas. I had been wondering for awhile how to find my way back to this organization — so the intern experience is a beginning in that way, as it’s opened that door to new conversations and opportunities.

For this past week, my focus has been on reading past issues of the three-times yearly magazine the organization publishes to understand the level of depth that profiles entail as preparation for the profile piece that I’ll be preparing for the next issue. I’ve spent time researching my profile subject as well, and interviewing the founder – next I’ll be interviewing several more (anticipating two) for this piece as I consider how the profile subject (an arts organization) impacts the communities it serves. And tomorrow, bright and early I’ll jump onto Amtrak and head north to Philadelphia to meet with my organization to discuss further details of how my intern semester will proceed: projects, deadlines, brainstorming and ideas. The train is just under two hours each way and a trip I’ve taken more times than I can count — so when I deboard, I’ll be looking for both the familiar and the new as I wind my way toward Rittenhouse Square and up to the 10th floor to meet colleagues from the past and new.

Rails, Planes, Bridges #morningview #longbridge #neverforget

Since 1808 the area known as Long Bridge has connected the Virginia side of the Potomac to the D.C. side of the Potomac; historically, this area was part of the capital city but was ceded back to Virginia pre-Civil War. A quick Google will turn up facts such as the history of the foot bridge here where rates were different for foot-only, or person plus horse traffic, and sheep or pigs. Today, freight and commuter trains roll by while planes take off nearly every minute from National Airport (as a long-timer here I do not call this airport by its current name). This week on one of the first not excruciating days of September, the skies are blue and clear — no humidity haze hangs on our heads as we walk and watch the human and nature made transportation soar and roar past us.

This particular week of September always feels compressed: the weather is finally changing, the sky is clearing but there are memories and sadness that lead to the compressed feeling compared to the expansiveness that next week will bring with the seasonal changes. Twenty-two years ago, September mornings started much the same as this one – clear blue skies, beautiful temperatures to meet the sunrise – a fall day full of hope. And smoke. And jet fuel. And destruction. And words that still do not full express the trauma of living near, and with terror. Here on this path, in the shadow of the Pentagon and its breach, I always feel that we live in one of the safest places in the world — we know the sounds of various types of helicopters, to look for the signs — a silent sky is not a friendly sky. It’s hard to think of the losses that are ever-present in hearts and minds. On this day, there is peace on these banks. The seabirds fly, the squirrels frantically dart and the day goes on as any other early fall day might, except for the memories.

Accomplished #bostonmfa #morningview (a few weeks ago)

On Flowers by Amy Merrick is a book I spotted recently at Boston’s Museum of Fine Arts — I didn’t want to carry the hardback home on the train so it’s on my wishlist for two reasons: it is beautiful and it is a great model for the type of writing I want to do.

I’m in my second year of an MFA program, which some in my world already know (but many do not). I considered heading down this road for years and here I am, right in the middle of the process. A current class I’m taking has me finally focusing on my blog, and investigating my thoughts about what being a writer means to me. Today, this road takes me to what it means to be accomplished, where this program has taken me so far (and where I hope it will go) and the differences and overlap between successful and accomplished.

What does being accomplished mean to me? I felt that before I addressed this question, I needed to know more about the word and its roots as in usage, accomplished is heaped with emotion and I wanted to remove that element to begin my thoughts. From the Oxford English Dictionary, the etymology of accomplish dates back to the 13th century Italian, Spanish, Catalan and Old Occitan (had to look this one up = historical Romance language leading to lyric poetry). Two definitions from the OED standout to me: To fulfil, perform, or carry out successfully (an undertaking, desire, request, etc.); to achieve (one’s object) and to make complete or perfect; to fit out or equip. This definition I found to be worth more consideration, though the OED states it is no longer common usage: To complete, spend, or pass (a period of time); to reach (a certain age). Accomplished to me is a combination of all of these definitions: a completed body of work, a completed course of desired action, achievements of my own definition and to spend periods of time working toward my desired body of work. I try, to varying degrees, to hold to these ideas as I know what I have accomplished to date, and will in the future, as these values are intrinsic — what I consider accomplished may not meet the definition of external forces (though acceptance and accolades are two things I certainly want).

In what ways have you become more accomplished during the course of this program? Now that I’m in my second year, I find the rearview on year one to be one that I absolutely treasure for the change it brought to my life in so many ways: from my ability to start and maintain my countenance and momentum through incredibly trying times to finding my lost writing voice. This is not to say that at times (many) I wondered how I could ever balance this commitment; but I did move through each step because it quickly became apparent that this program is about me and work that I produce is for myself (and readers one day), not work in service to others. These may sound like intangible accomplishments, but to me these are rock solid as I move into a new phase of my life. On the more tangible side, consistency in writing is a major accomplishment, that has led to production — this is one aspect I had hoped to gain by going into this program.

Is there a connection between being an accomplished writer and a published writer? Tricky question. I’ve known many accomplished writers over my life and their work might be buried in government reports, association magazines or bundles of letters — but these writers are not published in the way we might usually think of it. We all want to be published writers, and I think there are many routes to publication — I would love a best seller just like every writer, and I hate rejection emails just like every writer — but I know I’ll feel the most joy if I’m producing work that I feel good about and it finds its way to the right publication for the work. One great aspect of this course in publishing so far is expanding my own thoughts on avenues — some of which I already knew about but hadn’t put the “publishing lens” to before. Yes, I would love to publish my thesis in book form and have it reach readers that find it meaningful.

Is there a difference between being successful and accomplished as a writer? Yes. Success also has many layers to it and definitions society ascribes to it that make it something of a minefield to me. There are bestsellers that I will never understand and cannot get through; and plenty of essays that feel like gibberish from successful writers. There are many accomplished writers that put in all the elements that could lead to a bestseller, but never attain that ranking — so in many ways success can be artificial. I think this one really depends on how we define success for ourselves. I used to think I would love to give up my day job (currently teaching English to college students) and write as my main activity/income generator — but now I’m not so sure; yes, I would like to write and also earn from that, but I also know I need different inputs and I have a lifetime of skills that I want to and should use as well. Moving toward a more writing-friendly day job is certainly in the forefront of my mind as I write this post (teaching composition doesn’t mean the composition professor has a ton of brain cells left over for her own creative work each day). To wrap-up: yes, there can be, should be, and are differences between successful and accomplished but these don’t necessarily need to be in separate silos — there should be cross-over on this winding path.

Train in the Window #morningview

My view from the treadmill today — a Virginia Railway Express train headed rapidly toward downtown. The heat is excruciating today, at 85 degrees at 7:30 am. This heat often leads to train slowdowns as the rails buckle from the hothouse humidity of the air coupled with the intense friction from train speed — but this driver seems determined to make the schedule, which I admire from a punctuality standpoint (and former train commuter) but from my perch inside this wonderfully chilled community center gym, I silently wish for safe delivery of all passengers.

Just before this commuter train whizzed into view, the longest freight train I’ve ever seen in the city ambled by at a speed of no more than 20 mph — each car swaying in waltzing fashion slightly to and fro, frame in-tact, but timid in approach. As my footfalls caused me to start feeling the sweat and I turned on the extra fan on the treadmill’s dashboard, I wondered how it comes to be that toxic chemical containers on freight trains are situated right next to newer cars with eco-friendly bamboo floors. How do all of these co-mingled things live side-by-side for endless miles, couple and uncouple, to land products on the shelves of Target stores near and far?

Trains: transportation of people and goods, and the truest view of the world.

On the train again…

 

img_20190420_120241I’m rolling into the Baltimore station yet again, and since my last trip north on the exact same train, in the quite car again, where I sat just two months ago when our train struck a human on the tracks. Since we pulled out of the last station, I’ve been head down in my book, hoping for the best — we’re cruising through Baltimore’s tunnels now and should hopefully arrive at the station without incident. For weeks after the accident, I scanned the news for mention of the poor soul that was struck – that poor woman whose life will never be the same. For now, it seems that we’re cruising slowly, and peacefully into the station.

Several questions have dogged me since that train ride in March, and all of those questions revolve around trauma. May is Mental Health Awareness month and since today is the last of the month, I find myself really pondering how we as a society can emphasize the importance of mental health check-ups. Part of the marketing campaign for the month revolves around the phrase “breaking the stigma” — which I completely support; part of breaking the stigma is turning things from oddities into routines.

For a woman to find herself on a set of train tracks — most certainly involved trauma, not just the accident, but whatever brought her to that place. Because news coverage is so weak, it is impossible to know her circumstance before or after the accident; but no one finds themselves near train tracks on a well-known busy commuter corridor in a major metropolitan area without having lived through some trauma. And what of the train driver and other staff that saw the accident yet could not prevent it? What of the first responders — who must see accidents like this on a regular basis? Trauma is all around us, yet our American culture remains steadfast in its neglect of the fact that the eyes cannot un-see, the brain cannot un-learn and the flesh cannot un-feel.

We must do more.